What Having a Baby Does to You (Looking Back close to a decade later)

 I wrote this nearly ten years ago, when Miss C was a toddler and motherhood felt like it had completely taken over my life.

At that time, everything revolved around nap schedules, feeding times, diaper bags, nursery rhymes, and functioning on broken sleep. I genuinely believed life had permanently shifted into this new version.

Reading it now feels like looking at a snapshot of a very specific phase — intense, exhausting, overwhelming… and strangely beautiful.

Because slowly, over the years, many of those things changed again.

Sleep became more continuous. Outings became spontaneous again. Nursery rhymes quietly gave way to my older playlists. The diaper bag retired. And the messy house… well, that doesn’t change ever, does it? 😄

But that version of me was very real too.

So I’m leaving her thoughts here, just as they were lived and felt.

Happy Mother's Day

 This Mother’s Day, while re-doing my blog, I stumbled upon a post I had written when my daughter was 3 years old. 

I expected to skim through it, edit it and add it to my blog diaries. Instead, I sat there reading every line with a smile — and nostalgia slowly creeping in.

It wasn’t a milestone post or a big parenting moment. It was simply a detailed account of one completely ordinary day from the toddler years.

Day in the life of a SAHM

 

So what do you do the entire day? A lot of SAHMs are asked this question day in and day out.  Thankfully, I haven't directly faced this question but I anyway thought of penning down what exactly I do, rather did from the time I woke up today. So here goes -

7:30 AM - Woke up bleary-eyed after a broken night of sleep because the little one had woken up multiple times asking for her beloved car toothbrush — packaging included, of course.

7:40 AM - Finally out of bed, mentally listing the day’s tasks before my feet even touched the floor. Morning routine done quietly while trying not to wake her up. Warm water in hand, husband seen off for the day, brain already running at full speed.

8:10 AM - Quick shower done. Straight into the kitchen, silently praying she continues sleeping for just a little longer. Breakfast prep begins. I had thankfully planned weekday breakfasts in advance, so uttapam batter was ready to go. Milk boiling, vegetables chopped, rice and dal washed, lunch prep done. Oh, the vessels washed last night need to be sorted out as well. 

8:45 AM - Still asleep. Rare and glorious. I start making uttapams, lest it gets late. Breakfast is ready for both of us in 15 minutes.

9:00 AM -Time to wake her up for summer camp. The next half hour disappears into toddler negotiations: brushing teeth, getting dressed, eating breakfast, convincing, distracting, cuddling, repeating.. Now, I hate rushing her. She is just 3, has started on summer camp to get a feel of how school might be, and I do not want her to feel rushed soon as she is up. So I let her take her time in these tasks.

10:15 AM - Back after drop-off. Technically, this was my “free time.” Or is it?

I quickly finish my breakfast, make a quick call to mom and start off with the remaining chores. The usual dusting, sweeping, mopping easily takes an hour. You see, there is something to be done every day. Laundry, cleaning cabinets, clearing stuff out - all of it are small tasks but do take time and effort! I quickly finish cooking lunch and look at the clock, it is 11:50!

11:50 AM – I finally get some time to check my phone – mails, whatsapp and Facebook. I prefer to skip the addictive social media and sit down to write a blog instead. 15 - 20 minutes of it and it's time to get ready to pick her up. So I get ready and take her favorite toy to pick her up from school.

12:45 PM- Back home after pickup. Bath time for the little one because summer heat and toddlers are a chaotic combination. Some chatting, some playing, and then it's time for lunch!

1:30 - 2:30 PM- Lunch time. Also implies story time! We eat our lunch with stories being told continuously as a form of mealtime entertainment. Today it is "Alibaba and the 40 thieves". Sometimes she is too bored of eating on her own and needs to be fed. I quickly finish my lunch and continue with the story and her lunch.

2:30 PM– We read a couple of books before she drifts off to sleep. That's her favorite activity before her afternoon nap.

3:10 PM- The little one is finally asleep! YAY! Now is my real me-time. Depending on my mood, I choose between the options I have - mindlessly browse the Internet, scroll through social media, promote my online store, write blogs, take part in online surveys for that extra pocket money, or just check destinations for our next trip. In short, these 2 hours is what keeps me sane! Hubby is mostly back before she wakes up and we get some time to catch up with the day's activities.

5:15 PM- She wakes up and wants us to cuddle and play with her. After 15-20 minutes of play and a quick snack, we head out for a walk to the nearby lake while squeezing in grocery shopping and conversations about absolutely random toddler things.

7:00 PM- Back home. A spray painting activity was promised earlier in the day, and this was to be fulfilled of course because toddlers never forget promises. Husband takes over entertaining duties while I sort dinner and simultaneously discuss recipes with my mother over the phone

7:30 - 8:00 PM - Dinner together as a family. More stories, this time usually narrated by dad while I finally got to eat slightly more peacefully, giving inputs to the Ramayana story that is being told, every few minutes!

8:30 PM - Kitchen cleanup begins. Counters wiped. Dishes sorted. Floor swept (because I am pedantic with possible OCD 😄)

9:00 PM - Kitchen closed for the day. I am drained but toddler's energy leve? Fully operational at 100%! She swings in between sofa handles, climbs on top of us, and ensures we are not left in peace for even a single moment! I try to grab in few minutes for myself but it seems close to impossible when she is awake!

10:00 PM - Time for a night bath, quick massage and change of clothes. As dear husband takes care of this, I finish off other pending tasks. I sit with the iPad, trying to continue writing, but it is story-time soon! So we both read a few books to her before calling it a day.

11:00 PM – Lights out, time to sleep. But is it that easy? Not really. Because bedtime involved a complete retelling of her entire day. What she did, what she ate, who she met, what her favourite part was. Only after that does she finally settle down to sleep.. I now have two options – cuddle with her and wait for her to sleep, so I can login later to finish the blog (and browse of course!), or just surrender and sleep with her.

I wisely choose the latter and doze off with her, planning to wake up early to finish the blog!

So yeah, that is pretty much how the day goes by. It is usually the same most days. Of course, there are cheat days when I opt for me-time to mopping the house, when I switch on the TV for her for those extra 10 minutes to get some time for myself or when we decide to order pizza because we are a bit lazy to cook! But yes, with a kid around, one hardly gets time for oneself. Anything more than 2 hours a day (thank God for that!) seems like a huge bonus!

I get a lot of help from my husband, mom and in-laws ( whenever they are around) and I still feel this way! There are thousands of ladies out there who manage everything- Home, work, 3 meals, cleaning up after kids, laundry and multiple other things single handedly. So, the next time you have this urge to question a mom how she spends her day, think again!

PS: Getting to post this after 4 days of typing it. 

– The Mother Duck Says 🦆

Raising a Talkative Toddler: What Worked for Us!

 Like most new parents, I found myself reading everything I could about raising a child—especially when it came to speech and vocabulary. Everywhere I looked, the advice was the same: talk, talk, and talk some more.

I didn’t start particularly early. I do remember occasionally talking to my tummy and playing music during pregnancy (and yes, feeling those little kicks!), but I was never quite sure how much of that really mattered.

What I do know is this: I had a very talkative toddler.

She had a very short phase of baby gibberish and, quite quickly, began naming things, forming small sentences, and expressing her thoughts clearly—by around 14–15 months. Considering that both my husband and I weren’t particularly talkative people, this used to surprise us.

Looking back, here are a few things we did—some intentionally, many without even realising—that may have helped.