Raising a Talkative Toddler: What Worked for Us!

 Like most new parents, I found myself reading everything I could about raising a child—especially when it came to speech and vocabulary. Everywhere I looked, the advice was the same: talk, talk, and talk some more.

I didn’t start particularly early. I do remember occasionally talking to my tummy and playing music during pregnancy (and yes, feeling those little kicks!), but I was never quite sure how much of that really mattered.

What I do know is this: I had a very talkative toddler.

She had a very short phase of baby gibberish and, quite quickly, began naming things, forming small sentences, and expressing her thoughts clearly—by around 14–15 months. Considering that both my husband and I weren’t particularly talkative people, this used to surprise us.

Looking back, here are a few things we did—some intentionally, many without even realising—that may have helped.

Amblyopia - the lesser known eye defect

The last summer holidays, we were visiting our homeland and catching up with a ton of relatives.

During one such get-together, a casual question came up—
“So, how come glasses? Does she watch a lot of TV or iPad?”

It was said lightly. Without malice. Almost routinely.

But in that moment, my mind travelled back a few years…
to an incident I had once written about.

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It Started as a Routine Check-Up

A few years ago, we had taken our daughter for her annual eye check-up.

As we waited, we reassured her—
“Just like the dental visit, we’ll be done in a few minutes.”

The doctor began with simple letters and numbers on a screen. For the first few slides, she answered confidently. We were relieved.

Then came slide four.

She hesitated.
Paused.
Turned her face away.

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That Subtle Shift

The next test involved an eye frame, with lenses being switched repeatedly.

What was supposed to be routine quickly turned into a struggle. After about 10 minutes, she was visibly tired—and deep down, we knew something wasn’t right.

My husband wasn’t too surprised.

He has Amblyopia, commonly known as lazy eye. His mother has it too. Ever since our daughter was born, he had been particular about getting her eyes checked.

I, on the other hand, had always had perfect vision. I believed—quite confidently—that these things usually come from the mother.

Well… turns out, that wasn’t entirely true.

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Waiting, Processing, Hoping

As eye drops were administered every 15 minutes for further tests, we sat there—processing it all.

We gently began preparing her for the idea of glasses.

To our surprise, she thought wearing them would be cool. That innocence brought a smile in the middle of our worry.

Thankfully, the doctor said she was too young for treatment or glasses for now and suggested a follow-up in a few months.

We walked out relieved—but with many questions.

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The Questions That Stayed

Why her?
At just 3 years old?
She barely had any screen time—hardly 20 minutes a day.

And yet, she had an eye power of 1.75.

That’s when I began reading more about Amblyopia.

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What is Amblyopia?

Amblyopia is a condition where the visual system doesn’t develop properly, leading to reduced vision in one (rarely both) eyes.

In simple terms, the brain starts ignoring signals from one eye, favouring the stronger one.

That’s why it’s called a lazy eye.

It typically develops from birth up to about 7 years of age.

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What Causes It?

Amblyopia can happen due to:

• Misalignment of the eyes (strabismus)
• Difference in vision clarity between the two eyes
• Astigmatism (irregular eye shape)
• Cataracts (less common in children)

Over time, the weaker eye gets used less, and the brain suppresses its input.

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Signs to Watch For

It’s not always obvious, but some signs include:

• One eye drifting inward or outward
• Squinting or shutting one eye
• Tilting the head to see clearly (this was a big one for us)
• Difficulty focusing
• Family history of eye conditions

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Why Early Detection Matters

The reassuring part is—Amblyopia can be treated.

And the earlier it’s caught, the better the outcome.

Treatment is most effective in childhood, especially before the teenage years.

My husband discovered his condition in Grade 12—by then, it was too late to fully correct it.

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Treatment Options

Depending on the case, treatment may include:

• Eye patches to strengthen the weaker eye
• Atropine eye drops to blur the stronger eye
• Glasses or lenses to correct vision differences
• Bangerter filters on glasses
• Surgery in more severe situations

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Coming Back to That Question…

“So, how come glasses? Too much screen time?”

Now I know—
the answer isn’t always that simple.

Sometimes, it’s genetics.
Sometimes, it’s how the eyes develop.
Sometimes, it has nothing to do with screens at all.

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A Gentle Reminder

That casual question wasn’t wrong—it’s just incomplete.

Because behind a child wearing glasses, there could be a story.
A diagnosis.
A journey that started much earlier than anyone sees.

So maybe, we pause before assuming.

And choose understanding over judgement.

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Final Thought

If there’s one thing this experience taught me, it’s this:

Don’t wait for signs. Get regular eye check-ups—especially if there’s family history.

Sometimes, what we catch early can make all the difference later.

– The Mother Duck Says 🦆

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Disclaimer

This post reflects personal experience and understanding. It is not a substitute for professional medical advice.

A Small Joke, A Big Shift: a Mom's perspective

It takes less than 10 seconds for a child to decide if they feel safe with you.

Back when my daughter was a toddler, there was a pattern I began to notice almost everywhere I took her. It usually started simply enough—with someone asking her name, making a bit of small talk, and trying to engage her in conversation. She is naturally warm and talkative, and usually responds without hesitation.

But then, almost inevitably, came a certain kind of statement:
“Okay, I’ll take your mom with me—she’ll come to my house,” or “Your grandma is mine now,” or even “I’ll take this toy home.”

Often, with a playful smile. Just to “test” her reaction.

And yet, in that very moment, I saw something shift in her.

Her expression would change—subtly, but unmistakably. She would pause, look unsure, and instinctively respond, “No, I want my mom/ajji.” After that, she would withdraw, uncertain about this person who had just claimed they could take away the people she loved most. Sometimes, she would avoid any further interaction altogether.

As adults, we often dismiss such interactions as harmless teasing. But I came to realise that for children, these statements do not feel harmless at all. To them, their parents and grandparents are not just people—they are their entire sense of safety and stability. Even their small belongings are part of what makes their world predictable and secure.

So when someone—even jokingly—talks about taking those away, it does not register as humor. It introduces uncertainty.

This became even more evident during a visit to my hometown. Being back in the house where I grew up, surrounded by familiar people and memories, was comforting. But experiencing those same interactions through the lens of a parent gave me a completely new perspective.

One day, our house-help was chatting with my daughter. She was delighted to see her, and my daughter, though initially hesitant, slowly began to warm up. The interaction was going well—until the familiar pattern emerged.

“Whose toy is this? I’ll take it home.”
“Your grandma left you here.”

The change was immediate. My daughter grew uneasy. Sensing this, my mother intervened and firmly told her that this was not the right way to speak to a child. The lady, even though not formally educated, understood and never repeated it.

However, the impact of that first interaction lingered. For the rest of our stay, my daughter remained uncomfortable around her. She would repeatedly say, “Jayalakshmi ajji will take my things,” even though we reassured her otherwise.

It struck me then—children may be quick to react, but they are even quicker to form lasting associations. It took several warmer interactions for her to begin trusting her again.

A similar situation occurred with a neighbour—someone kind, dependable, and deeply trusted by our family. Yet, when she made remarks like, “Your grandma will stay at our place,” my daughter responded the same way: with discomfort and distance.

It made me pause and reflect. If a stranger were to tell me, even jokingly, that they would take away someone I love, I would not find it amusing. My first instinct would be confusion, perhaps even defensiveness.

Why, then, do we expect children to interpret such statements differently?

Interestingly, I also saw the complete opposite play out. There were homes we visited where no such teasing occurred. The conversations were simple, respectful, and grounded in genuine curiosity about the child herself. These people asked her about her interests, engaged her thoughtfully, and responded with warmth and humor.

In those spaces, my daughter thrived. She spoke freely, played for hours, and connected effortlessly with people she had just met.

The difference was not in her personality. It was in how safe she felt.

Most of these teasing remarks, I’ve noticed, come from people who genuinely love children—often elders who have raised children themselves. Perhaps it is a habit, or a style of interaction that has been carried forward over generations.

But maybe it is time to pause and reconsider.

There are far better ways to engage with a child—ways that build trust rather than momentary amusement. Listening to them, asking about their world, and allowing them to feel seen and secure go much further than any clever remark ever could.

So the next time we meet a child, perhaps we can hold back from saying, “I’ll take your mom with me.”

Because what feels like a joke to us might be the very moment a child decides they do not feel safe with us.

And the moment a child stops feeling safe with you, they also stop letting you in.